Volunteering at Shanghai Healing Home -- An orphanage for babies with needs

About two weeks ago, I was browsing SmartShanghai (a website that tells you the hip and happening things up and about in this vast and bustling city) and I came across an article titled “Volunteering with Orphaned Babies”. I clicked on the link and found a few pictures of precious babies with, wait for it, cleft lip! Sign me up.

So, naturally, my mother hen clucked its way into emailing the organization and signing up. Two weeks later and it’s Saturday, October 17^th and I’m up and ready to head two hours East to Xujian village to help clean up play areas and aid in the stimulation of babies’ social and emotional growth. Talk about Heaven.

So after an almost two hour subway ride, I meet a group of smiling volunteers outside the station and we hop into cabs and drive even further into the “nothingness” that is the outskirts of the city. We passed by dilapidated buildings and rows of trees as we zigzagged down winding roads. I took a hit of my anti-nausea spray I got in Thailand more than once – this taxi driver was a beast.

Finally, we turn into an apartment complex and walk over towards a villa with a sign out front that says “Shanghai Healing Home”. It was a cute little building with toys out front. I could hear some crying babies and I couldn’t wait to get inside and cuddle them!

Our first task was to wipe down the play areas and toys. We scrubbed for what only seemed like minutes and then we got to play! Hoards of little munchkins made their way into five different play rooms, each separated into age groups. The most basic was a newborn nursery – I had to wait my turn for this one!

I slowly and cautiously approached a room with several little beebees in it staring up at me with nervous curiosity. I sat down on the mat and pushed a toy towards one little guy. He attempted to grab it and bat his hands at my legs.

You see, these babies had various physical and mental issues. One of the main issues happened to be cleft lip and palate, which I was excited about because I immediately felt connected to each and every baby having looked similar when I was a newborn. Another issue was limited mobility for various mental and physical reasons. I saw a couple babies battling fetal alcohol syndrome, some with extra fingers and some with extra toes, and some that looked “fine” but definitely weren’t.

Then the leader walked in with a darling little gem and said, “Sarah, do you want to take her?” Before I said, “uhhhh, wait, how do you hold a baby?!”, a little girl less than two years old was placed into my hands. She was lighter than air and frail as could be. She had wispy, soft hair that fell gently over her big, curious brown eyes. Her nose was a little button and beneath it was a double-cleft lip. I looked at her and whispered “Nihao”. She scrunched up her nose in an attempted smile and bared her crooked teeth at me. She started making a ch ch ch sound, so I mimicked her, and that was it: she didn’t want to leave my side.

As I was playing with Hua Yuan (literally translates into Flower Garden, which is very fitting considering just how beautiful and delicate this little baby was), another older baby waddled over to me. She had to be about 3. She looked at me, or rather, scowled. She threw a small train at me and so I picked it up and started running it up Hua Yuan’s leg, making a ch ch ch noise, which made her giggle. Just then, the 3 year old sat down firmly, rolled up her pant legs and said “Mama! Mama!” and pointed to her leg, signaling that she wanted me to roll the train up her leg now. I did and she smiled a big, goofy grin and looked at me happily. She rolled her pants up higher and I rolled the train from her leg, up her arm, and onto her head. She thought this was hilarious and giggled loudly. Then she screeched with excitement and ran away.

I turned my attention back to the frail and fragile Hua Yuan who I forgot to mention had soft casts on both of her arms. I asked the leader why she had these and never got an answer. The casts made it hard for her to crawl so she needed a lot of extra help. I had no choice but to devote most of my attention to her. The 3 year old was pretty pissed and I very quickly made an observation that most of the “older” babies were neglected in this room. They could fend for themselves and keep occupied whereas the babies needed constant care and support. This hurt my heart a little.

I left Hua Yuan and the others for a bit to hit up the newborn nursery. I walked in treading softly and looked around. All of these babies looked severely deformed, for lack of a better word. They all had something, and it was obvious. I noticed one little guy in rabbit pajamas rolling around the room. I went over and laid down beside him and said “Nihao, roly poly!” He smiled a very thin, crooked smile and stuck out his tongue, which actually never went back inside his mouth. He snorted and breathed hard, getting a little too excited at my presence. I decided to back off a bit and just watch him roll around and smile, making sure he didn’t roll into any other babies.

Another little dude was arching his neck in an awkward way to look at me, so I went over and picked him up, trying to support his neck. I realized that his joints were very stiff and he was hard to hold. I managed to get him comfortable enough so that he grabbed at my chest and nuzzled in for an “assume the nap position” position. He looked up at me and drowsily drifted off to sleep.

Women of the world, back me up. Is there anything more “I want a baby or several” than watching a gorgeous little baby fall into a peaceful sleep against your chest while doing that cute little sucking thing with their lips? Omg… My ovaries.

I awkwardly held this sleeping baby until an Ayi saw me, chuckled, and took him to a sleeper. (She was probably thinking, bitch have you ever held a living thing?!) After that, I met a little man with Down syndrome who was obsessed with my eyes and constantly trying to grab my fingers. I stared at him for a while and smiled as I watched his reaction – I don’t know if it was fear or curiosity – to my bright teal nail polish (the kids were obsessed with my nails!). Note to self: Wear bright nail polish when I go back.

The babies were sweet and cute and surprisingly quiet and calm! I couldn’t believe it. I was expecting projectile vomit and ear piercing screams; but in reality, they just wanted someone to rub their backs and help them onto their stomachs.

I went back to the “older” baby room where a sassy little girl with an unrepaired double-cleft lip was standing near the door about to charge. I opened and closed it quickly and grabbed her up. “Nihao little one!” She was strong! She shrieked and squirmed and I almost dropped her! I made my way onto the mat with her and tried to sit her nicely on my lap. Nope. She scrambled off my lap and started shrieking and crying. I wasn’t sure what to do. I stroked her hair and clapped my hands. Nothing. Then, she climbed up me and looked straight at my glasses. THWAP! Right off my face. Because she was so close to me, I could see this made her smile, so I paused a moment to soak up that beautiful unrepaired smile. Then, I retrieved my glasses, put them on, and THWAP! At this point, I had to hand her off to another volunteer and go clean my glasses.

When I came back, she was otherwise engaged, so I watched her from afar. She had such a huge personality, it radiated throughout the room. As I watched her snatch toys from the other babies, the 3 year old waddled back over to me, planted herself in my lap, and thrust an animal toy at me. “Mama!” she said. She was pointing at the animal buttons and so I made the sounds that the animals made. She looked at me and did it again, “MAMA!” Dog? “Ruff ruff” I barked. She barked back. Then I said “dog”, but she just said ruff ruff. I eventually got her to say hello and bye-bye. ENGLISH TEACHER FOREVER AND ALWAYS! J

I was busy mooing like a cow when I felt a very light nudge on my back. I turned and there was Hua Yuan ch-ch-ch-ing away. I said hello and she smiled. She held her arms out wide and came in for a hug. The 3 year old had motored off at this point, so I hoisted Hua Yuan up and brought her to the window where she looked up at the sky and out into the light of day. When we turned around, the room was empty. An Ayi came in and said “che fan xian zai!” (Eat now/lunch time). I surrendered Hua Yuan to an Ayi and went down with the masses to observe the children’s dining time. Hua Yuan watched me as she was plopped down into a booster seat and fed gingerly by a loving Ayi. I watched her and made faces to keep her occupied. When I stopped, she started crying. I could tell I should have just left her alone because now she wanted me to come and get her. An Ayi told me I could grab her out of her seat, so I did and walked her over to a wall of pictures.

On this wall were pictures of the babies from each room. I found a picture of Hua Yuan pre-surgery with her unrepaired double cleft lip smiling away. Her eyes were just so big and beautiful! I felt pretty emotional at this point and was relieved that the day was almost over – my emotions, and ovaries, couldn’t handle much longer.

The leader came by and said “Ready to go?” and Hua Yuan tightened her grip on me. I eventually got her into a walker and distracted so I could leave, but it was hard. It was hard to wave goodbye to all the sweet babies who waved and smiled as we left the compound. They looked at us longingly, wondering, I’m sure, if we’ll be back.

This experience made me feel so completely blessed and humble. Thank goodness I was born in Canada to a loving family who didn’t mind a little extra elbow grease to support a baby with a facial difference. Thank goodness I was loved by so many people, and knew it (!) throughout my at times very hard and painful childhood growing up with a cleft lip and palate.

Thank goodness for volunteers who give these adorable orphans a chance to smile and play and infect us with their energy and grandiose personalities.

Will I go back? Well, it was a two-hour commute each way, but for those faces – especially little Hua Yuan – I’d make the trek.

Yours,

Sarah the loving Wun