Enjoy!
That is the damn Scream mask!!! I teach grade 2!!! Nightmares.
The vocab word is "scary". Yeah, obviously!! It's the mothereffing
scream mask!!!!!!!!
It's not even Bernard's last day as a substitute and he gets a
goody bag of donuts, Twix, and letters from students. He's reading letters now.
They are quite nice. :). As his wife, I approve of the two donuts and two Twix bars.
You know you are having a bad day when Scott Baines calls you a
dumbass and it almost hurts. Almost. For why I am being so angry and sad? For
why my students? For whyyyy? I will pay for a plane ticket over here for
whoever wants to fly to Abu Dhabi and deal with my animals today. At least I
have strawberries! :)
oh HEY burnout! Fancy your ass happening on a Monday!! In other
news, I'm nauseous. Maybe it's my body saying, "Bitch, I don't care about
your lactose intolerance, give me some chocolate!" Maybe...
A woman just stopped me in the middle of an overpass and asked
me in Russian if I was Russian. *pause* I'll allow it. Ladies and gentlemen,
Svetlannah is BACK! Needless to say, Bertrov Wunslovski and I are speak in Russian
accent for rest of day."Dis is how I come to loff vajina!"
I'm covered to my ears with ice packs trying to cool down my
toasty body. Freezing on the inside but hot as volcanic ash on the outside.
Body, for why you are playing these games? Regulate and let me SLEEP. :( I
refuse to take ANOTHER day off of work, so bitch let's speed this UP.
This dinosaur was stupid. I cannot believe "stupid" is
a vocabulary word this week. I have to teach my kids, notorious for insulting
each other, the word "stupid". Sweet Jesus.
So I'm having a rough day and I text Bernard who is shopping. I
tell him to throw the soymilk to the ground, because I'm angry, and he does!!!
Husband of the year goes to Bernard who would please his wife by disturbing the
peace at the grocery store. Xoxoxo.
A couple of grade 11 girls who love Bernard waited for me in the
KG building for 15 minutes after school just to give me cupcakes. In a lovely
bag no less! These girls are in LOVE with me. Never taught them. I don't even
know their teacher. And yet they somehow knew today was a much needed cupcake
day! They begged me teach grade 12 next year. :) Considering it.
"Miss you know crack?"
Uh, what?
"Miss you know crack??"
Sure.
"I have."
That's not okay!
"No problem."
If you say so!!! Six year old ESL students say the best things.
Uh, what?
"Miss you know crack??"
Sure.
"I have."
That's not okay!
"No problem."
If you say so!!! Six year old ESL students say the best things.
This orange beast is in my office. Word on the street is they
are not the nicest creatures. Needless to say, I'm getting the eff out of my
office right now!!! I am also peeing my pants a bit. Try eating lunch
peacefully and out of the corner of your eye you see this mothereffer cruising
around!!! The picture does not do justice to the beastly nature of this thing.
Bitch please, I'm from Canada. When my kids get perfect, they
get a snowman sticker!! Also, I hand write my own worksheets like a boss.
I finally managed to wrap my shayla and pin it to stay!! :)
yessssss. Comfort and Arab fashions for the win.
"Miss, you know how I know you are fantastic teacher? You
are not lazy."
I am so flattered to know that some of my students, probably all of them, value my energy and enthusiasm. To be called not lazy by a 7 year old is truly a compliment. I will not doubt my teaching style and ability again. I must be doing a good job for such a specific compliment from a shy student who has improved immensely. :) :) :).
I am so flattered to know that some of my students, probably all of them, value my energy and enthusiasm. To be called not lazy by a 7 year old is truly a compliment. I will not doubt my teaching style and ability again. I must be doing a good job for such a specific compliment from a shy student who has improved immensely. :) :) :).
So I went to an after school party and I think it was
successful. Reasons: a woman yelled "long live Canada" in Arabic
while I was dancing, I ate an assload of Lebanese food, and the Middle Eastern
teachers clapped when I successfully smoked from the hooka. Bitch, I don't play
around!!
I hate when my Sunday starts terribly before 8am. Feeling mighty
useless and invisible. Here's hoping my inner sunshine makes an appearance
today and erases all the uselessness I feel.
Yesterday there was water all over the floor so today I gave my
kids a talking to about keeping the bathroom clean. I said "you are
beautiful children. Keep your bathroom clean! Are you monkeys? Do you pee on
floors like monkeys?!" I said this thinking it was a farfetched idea.
Little did I know that, out of spite I'm sure, one of the kids pissed on the
floor in the bathroom today. What is this I don't even!!!
Here's an art project idea for any of my teacher friends! My
kids made popcorn flowers for Arabic class! Took me like a week to realize it
was popcorn...
Sarah
I'm representing for my gangsters all across the world. Snowmen.
Apples. Canada what!
"I like your body."
Me: Thank you...
"I want. I can't because I am too much fatty."
Me: Oh... alright.
"What you eat?"
Me: Uhh... I can't have dairy, but I eat most other things.
"I like your body."
I will never complain about my body again. Apparently, it's the tops...
"Miss, you from where? China?"
No, Canada.
"Oh! I thought China because you have small eyes."
*pause* Am I.... Have I been wrong this entire time? Am I the Asian one in my marriage? 0___o Mama? Did you birth an Asian child? *whispers* Is that child ME?!
Me: Thank you...
"I want. I can't because I am too much fatty."
Me: Oh... alright.
"What you eat?"
Me: Uhh... I can't have dairy, but I eat most other things.
"I like your body."
I will never complain about my body again. Apparently, it's the tops...
"Miss, you from where? China?"
No, Canada.
"Oh! I thought China because you have small eyes."
*pause* Am I.... Have I been wrong this entire time? Am I the Asian one in my marriage? 0___o Mama? Did you birth an Asian child? *whispers* Is that child ME?!
So Bernard and I watched Jurassic Park last night. What a
FANTASTIC movie! A little scary, no? I had to go to the bathroom so I asked
Bernard to turn on the lights and walk me there JUST IN CASE a velociraptor was
in the apartment. Am I a pansy or what?!
It's 8:05am and three kids have cried already. Good Morning!!! I
guess that's what happens when the Arabic teacher overhears that only 4
students did their homework! They didn't cry when I yelled at them, but they
did when the Arabic teacher calmly asks them to respect me. Thank goodness at
least HER voice has an impact on my students.
So I walk into my office (sauna) and open a cupboard and a BEAST
stares me in the face before scurrying away!!! This big ROACH made the roaches
in my kitchen look like ants!!! Pretty sure I'm still experiencing bouts of
HEART ATTACK!!! My office door is open. I refuse to close it. I will NOT be
trapped in here with a roach the size of my face (finger)!!! .____.
MORNINGGGGGGG!
Nothing could prepare me for this answer... This is a science
quiz about forces... So, naturally... Sweet baby Jesus.
One of my students stabbed another one with a pushpin... What's
next? Seriously, universe, please prepare me for the next moment of 2Y batshit
crazy.
Despite my terrible day, I successfully taught my kids how to
make owls with a feather tummy. They really enjoyed it! :)
I told my students that I was in a bad mood and if they bothered
me during silent reading time I would explode. *pause* The silence was
beautiful, despite its brevity.
